I'm not a lawyer but I am in court alot JMW/Sirius

[The Outlaw]

We're in a dieing business, the fame isn't as world wide as it use to be, the zeros on the checks get smaller and smaller and for many of us we now have day jobs such as running a wrestling school for some and as for others, well they do battle in the court room to get paid and keep their mind sharp.

Today for one man, that of course being John M White, is no different from any other. He sat at a large desk, there was however no client sitting beside him and in usual fashion John expected nothing less from the scum bags he usually represents. But today as the judge made his way into the room and the crowd rose to their feet and sat down whomever John was to represent was still nowhere to be found. With the bang of a gavel the Judge put the room into order and spoke...

[Judge] "For the first order of business..."

He looked at his docket reading three names and then to the room where only John sat.

[Judge] "Are all parties even present?"

John stood up and prepared to speak but before one word could fall from his silver tongue the doors to the court room swung open and in walked The Outlaw and at his side was Aaron Sirius....

[Holiday] "Sorry I'm late your honor, I took a few too many sleeping pills last night to replace the usual alcohol that puts me to bed, I wanted to make sure I was sober for this one!"

Aaron and Aaron, or Holiday and Sirius to be less confusing made their way to the plaintiff's desk and the Judge shook his head as he spoke.

[Judge] "That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard, far too stupid for you to make up even so for that I'll excuse you. Now lets move things along. According to the docket you Mr. Holiday representing yourself and Aaron James Sirius are here due to a breach of contract by the hands of Mr. White correct?"

[Holiday] "Yes."

[JMW] "WHAT?!? This is ludicrous!"

[Holiday] "Your honor let it be noted on record that, that man's word is not to be trusted for the sheer fact he IS a lawyer. Furthermore it is record ably know that he is manipulative to get what he wants."

[JMW] "OBJECTION! What does this have to do with anything?"

[Holiday] "I'm allowed to attest to the character of the defendant."

"BANG"

The gavel hits the podium as the judge reclaims order in the court.

[Judge] "Okay Mr. Holiday, in your own words, please tell me why we are here."

[Holiday] "As a former commissioner of Real Extreme Wrestling I signed several talent contracts and most of them all have the same things written in their contract. However Aaron Sirius is an exception to those "Usual" contracts and in many different ways. He was not to be booked until a certain date and he was, he is also exempt from being fired without the complete discretion and unison vote of the REW board consisting of Me, John Michael White, Scotty Raven, Seth, Cloudstrife, and I think there's some girl involved. My client was booked before he was set to perform any job duties and furthermore was fired for not showing and it was at the discretion to book and fire him by one man, John Michael White."

The attention of the court room gazes upon the shine dome of one lawyer....

TBC?

[johnmwhite]

--John Michael White sits there, silent for a moment. One might say stunned, but he's not stunned, he is merely biding his time, waiting for the right opportunity to turn the tables and demonstrate that his opponent is nothing but a piece of shit jobber bitch punk who totally sucks and can't write for toffee and by the way I had sex with his aunt or his mother or whatever it is that annoys people and makes me look like a total prat trying too hard to be cool and edgy oh and another thing...--

Judge: Mister White?

--Oh crap, he really doesn't have a plan for this one.--

John Michael White: Um... I move for a recess to allow my counsel, which is myself, to look over the newly submitted evidence.

--The judge nods, handing the contract to the bailiff.--

Judge: Very well, we will take... what on earth are you doing?!

--Having received the contracts in question from the bailiff, John Michael White has set them on fire with his cigar.--

John Michael White: What?

--A quick squirt from a fire extinguisher puts out the papers, but they are already charred beyond recognition. Now Holiday looks stunned, genuinely, and is totally not just biding his time with a plan to turn the tables because he's not nearly as super awesome as I am. Even if I am acting in a rather standard fashion right now...--

John Michael White: Your honour, I move that the evidence be stricken from the record on account that it no longer exists.

Judge: You've got to be kidding me.

Aaron Holiday: Well it just so happens that I have made photocopies, your honor.

--That's Holiday pronouncing honour the American way. And photocopies? Come on! Who makes photocopies of legal documents? So damn convenient for Holiday, isn't it? The Outlaw hands them over, and the bailiff leaves them on the lawyer's desk, making sure to keep a very close eye on anything flammable that might appear in JMW's hands.--

John Michael White: Well... I still move that these be stricken from the record.

Judge: *sigh* On what grounds?

John Michael White: On the grounds that REW has notoriously poor record keeping. As the landmark case Worship versus Reality demonstrates, they cannot keep their own title reigns in order. How are we to trust that this document really comes from REW, or is in synch with our time frame and reality? It could have been planted there by a Time Lord.

--The judge just shakes his head.--

Judge: Petition denied. I'm ruling in Sirius' favour. No damages will be awarded, but his status as a member of the REW roster is fully restored, and he may begin duties on his pre-arranged date.

John Michael White: DAMMIT!

--Fortunately the lawyer's curse is somewhat drown out by the banging gavel. Still, it hurts as he stands there, knowing that something has happened to him that has never happened before. He's lost a case. Holiday approaches the REW World Champion as he stands stock-still behind his desk.--

Holiday: Well, at least that's sorted out. What were you thinking anyway, you knew Sirius wasn't ready to come back yet.

John Michael White: I was thinking somebody has to shake the place up before it dies in the ditch.

--As the courtroom clears, Holiday and JMW stand still in the surge of people, islands in the street, that is what they are, oh wait that's a song. And they're indoors.--

Aaron Holiday: You know REW will never die. It's like zombie Jesus or something, always roaming along, no matter how many bits fall off.

John Michael White: I wouldn't be so sure. You listed our entire board in there. Six people. Seven if you include Sirius for the duties he does. You know how many ringers ever actually lace up boots around here?

Aaron Holiday: Well there's Trash, and Myst just got back, and... well Blake and Kyzer were sort of around before you fired them.

John Michael White: Neither of them laced up boots. Neither of them were interested in anything but talking about how great they once were and how much nookie they still get. This isn't Jersey Shore - this is REW. This is supposed to be a community built on wrestling, but it's looking more and more like a historic preservation society. My world title gathers dust because I never have to sweat to keep it. It no longer shows I am the best, it just shows that I'm the survivor. It's a campaign medal.

Aaron Holiday: So, do something about it.

John Michael White: I did. I did lots of things about it. We all have - you, me, Cloud, Icy. No one wants to fight for it any more.

Aaron Holiday: Worship sounds like he does.

John Michael White: Eh, Worship just wants to fight for his right to tell everybody else they suck. He lost his real passion somewhere along the way. The passion that made him cripple me just to win a belt. Now he doesn't even get his hands dirty, only his potty mouth.

Aaron Holiday: What about Trash? He's been number one contender like forever.

John Michael White: He deserves a shot, no question, but if he wins we know I'll just get a rematch and probably win it back, and if I don't we are back to square one either way. No other contenders, no real depth of competition. He could fight you but then what do you do?

Aaron Holiday: So what's the answer? You're always the man with a plan.

--The lawyer shakes his bald head.--

John Michael White: Not this time.

--His words echo into silence as he and Holiday are left alone in the courtroom.--

TBC by ?