Post by eltocino on Jan 30, 2011 1:02:51 GMT -5
El Tocino Episode 3: Traffic Sucks!
After missing the big splash off the bar counter, our hero Tocino is currently motionless in a pile of broken wood. Holiday walks up to the downed Luchador.
Holiday: Don't you wish you spent more time learning to actually fight instead of doing those stupid flips?
Holiday kicks Tocino in the ribs, causing Tocino to roll around in pain.
Holiday: Come on you gotta have more in you than this!
Not willing to wait for Tocino to get up, Holiday grabs him by the head and drags him to the bar counter.
Holiday: Since you life jumping of things lets see how far I can send ya!
With that said, Holiday lifts up Tocino and attempts to put Tocino onto the bar. Tocino starts to move around trying to wiggle free from Holiday's grasp.
Tocino: No! No señor!
Holiday: Did I say you can move!
Holiday clubs the Tocino in the back a few times stopping Tocino's protest. Holiday then lifts Tocino up and lays him face down on the bar.
Tocino: No...
Holiday moves Tocino back and forth kinda like how a bobsledder do with their sled.
Holiday: Here we go!
Tocino: NOOO!
Holiday slides Tocino clear across the counter making Tocino fly off the other end.
Holiday: Hmm... I guess I over shot it. I must admit I'm not the best curler in the world. Guess I'm gonna need more practice!
He walks across the Saloon to grab Tocino to send him for another run. How ever, as he walks towards Tocino he steps on Tocino's cape. Noticing this Tocino pulls his cape out from under Holiday causing him to stumble and fall face first into a near by table.
Holiday: Owww! What the hell.
As Holiday turns around Tocino roundhouse kicks him in the head.
Holiday: That's the best you got?
Tocino follows the chair shot by ramming his knee into Holiday's face. After the knee Tocino looks at Holiday and notices that The Outlaw is dazed but getting back up.
Holiday: I'ma get you!
Tocino quickly grabs Holiday, lifts him up and drops him with a brainbuster through the nearby table. Tocino picks himself up and leans up against the bar counter.
Tocino: Bueno...
As Tocino is trying to get a breather, the front door of the Saloon opens up. This causes Tocino to looks at the door in defense thinking someone else is gonna come after him. However as he looks at the door he sees Referee Chad Tally.
Chad: Sorry I'm late traffic is a bitc...
Chad Tally looks around the saloon to see the broken glasses, chairs and tables.
Chad: Looks like I missed alot.
Chad Tally looks and sees Tocino standing and Holiday laying on the ground.
Chad: Has he been out for about 10 seconds?
Tocino shrugs due to the fact he was not counting how long Holiday was down for.
Chad: Well... I guess you win.
And with that the referee walks out of the bar.
Tocino: Que?
Tocino shrugs off his confusion and walks out of the saloon. As he does this Holiday gets up only being down for approximately 7 seconds.
Holiday: Where is he going? What just happened?
Holiday grabs his head in pain.
Holiday: Stupid Taco!
He gets up and walks to the bar, he finds another bottle of moonshine and pours himself a glass.
Holiday: The best cure for a headache!
And with that Holiday enjoys his drink, Tocino walks away a winner even tho he had no idea what was going on this whole time and traffic sucks.