Post by themiracle on Jul 19, 2009 0:20:45 GMT -5
Numerous hours have passed, since the huge traffic jam kept me from arriving to the REW on time.
I've spoken to Scotty Raven, and everything is on the up and up with my contract. I am officially the newest and obviously greatest acquisition the REW could ever had imagined.
I am seated on a leather sofa in my locker room. I am sipping on a iced bottled of Blue Moon. My television on, with a re-run of REW Wrath on the air.
"So this is the best this place has to offer? Looks like REW needs a MIRACLE! Lucky for them that's where I come in!"
I sit thinking to myself, maybe just maybe it's time I give the fans of the federation the thrill of a lifetime. I rise to my feet. I readjust my boots really quick, and put on my robe before heading out of the room and into the hall with the little people.
Upon entry into the hall I got a bunch of looks and stares obviously from the jealous people, who wish they could look just like I look.
I can not say I blame any of the other so-called superstars for being jealous, when they look at me they obviously fill up with emotions of inadequacy.
As I make my way past all the lesser-than-me's, I spot something that catches my attention. I the shining golden luster of the REW Bar Room Brawl championship.
The only problem is the neanderthal of a man who happens to be carrying the said championship at the moment. A man who has obviously, gone on one too many drinking binges during horror films.
"Is this really the kind of man the fans want holding their gold, some c-rated horror flick junkie?"
I shake my head in disbelief, that the moment upon my arrival this creature, because he damn sure isn't any kind of normal human, wasn't immediately stripped of his champion, and having been awarded the gold myself just for well being me.
I decide to blow off my aggravation over Scotty Raven's poor judgment, and continue on my way. I walk past the man with the shimmering gold, and shoulder check him. He turns his attention to me, and doesn't seem like a very nice guy. But in reality, I'm not a very nice guy either, as I ignore him completely and go on.
After what seems like an eternity in the backstage area with all the skeptics and wannabes, I finally reach my destination. I'm only centimeters away from the curtain, I will walk though, that will forever etch my name as the greatest talent the REW or any federation for that matter will ever lay their beady little eyes on.
"Hey you! Geek Squad!"
"Actually I'm just the tech guy."
"And I care because why? Listen get my entrance ready, and it better be perfect, or it'll be a MIRACLE if you ever walk again I promise you."
"Yes sir!"
So the geek squad kid scurries off like a rodent. I stand admiring myself once again in a mirror they keep backstage. I pull some baby oil out of my robe, and oil myself up real nice to give the ladies a cheap thrill even though they can only look and never touch.
Finally the geek squad member returns and informs my all is set and my entrance will begin in a matter of seconds.
"I appreciate that Johnny!"
"Eh...my name is Rupert."
"Remember that me not caring thing? Yeah it's still in effect."
Just then I hop to attention "I Am Hollywood" by He Is Legend signals the introduction of greatness into the REW.
Some blond bimbo steps into the ring with a microphone and begins informing the fans on just how lucky they really are.
"Introducing to the REW, hailing from Hesperia, California. He stands at six feet three inches tall. He weighs in at a chiseled two hundred twenty-seven pounds. Allow me to introduce "The MIRRRRRRRRRACLEEEEEEEEEE" MANSON HALLMARK! "
I step atop the ramp, and I notice the drool running down the faces of the females who would do just about anything to get a hold of me.
I'm sure all of these fans are quite starstruck I notice tons of flash photography taking place. I finally reach the ring and upon entry I relieve the bimbo of her microphone and shew her from my ring.
"Well you fans consider yourself lucky. You will be able to tell your grandchildren, you where there the night Manson Hallmark made his debut in the REW."
I receive a mixed reaction from the fans upon that announcement.
"You see, I am not like the other hapless wannabe superstars you are used to. The Jaxson Kyzer's, the Blake Worship's, the Sweet Money's. I am "God's Gift To Himself"! "
The jeers seem more illuminated now than before.
"You see I expected jeers and boos from all of you. You hate me not because I'm a bad guy, but because I'm the bad guy you wish you could be, but just can not become."
This time the boos are almost deafening. I however just stand in the center of the ring chuckling
" You see, God decided to create the most divine creature he could as a token of his own hard work, and I was the MIRACLE that followed. But I am out here for a reason. I was backstage and I was sick to my stomach."
I pause for a moment. I demand the stagehand give me a bottle of water. And he does just that. I take a sip and decide to continue my rant.
" There is a man walking around backstage with something that is mine. A man who thinks he really deserves to be holding my Bar Room Brawl Championship. Listen up Comic-Con does not begin for another week, so you can stop it with the big scary creature gimmick ok pal, because it's not working. "
I didn't think it was possible but the jeers increase even more vociferously. But the smile never leaves my face.
" So in other words, DreamKiller sooner or later you and I will meet one on one. I will walk out with my much deserved Bar Room Brawl Championship, and you, it'll be a MIRACLE if you walk out period. But I'm just telling you what you already know!"
I drop the microphone in the center of the ring and roll out and begin my expedition back to my locker room
I've spoken to Scotty Raven, and everything is on the up and up with my contract. I am officially the newest and obviously greatest acquisition the REW could ever had imagined.
I am seated on a leather sofa in my locker room. I am sipping on a iced bottled of Blue Moon. My television on, with a re-run of REW Wrath on the air.
"So this is the best this place has to offer? Looks like REW needs a MIRACLE! Lucky for them that's where I come in!"
I sit thinking to myself, maybe just maybe it's time I give the fans of the federation the thrill of a lifetime. I rise to my feet. I readjust my boots really quick, and put on my robe before heading out of the room and into the hall with the little people.
Upon entry into the hall I got a bunch of looks and stares obviously from the jealous people, who wish they could look just like I look.
I can not say I blame any of the other so-called superstars for being jealous, when they look at me they obviously fill up with emotions of inadequacy.
As I make my way past all the lesser-than-me's, I spot something that catches my attention. I the shining golden luster of the REW Bar Room Brawl championship.
The only problem is the neanderthal of a man who happens to be carrying the said championship at the moment. A man who has obviously, gone on one too many drinking binges during horror films.
"Is this really the kind of man the fans want holding their gold, some c-rated horror flick junkie?"
I shake my head in disbelief, that the moment upon my arrival this creature, because he damn sure isn't any kind of normal human, wasn't immediately stripped of his champion, and having been awarded the gold myself just for well being me.
I decide to blow off my aggravation over Scotty Raven's poor judgment, and continue on my way. I walk past the man with the shimmering gold, and shoulder check him. He turns his attention to me, and doesn't seem like a very nice guy. But in reality, I'm not a very nice guy either, as I ignore him completely and go on.
After what seems like an eternity in the backstage area with all the skeptics and wannabes, I finally reach my destination. I'm only centimeters away from the curtain, I will walk though, that will forever etch my name as the greatest talent the REW or any federation for that matter will ever lay their beady little eyes on.
"Hey you! Geek Squad!"
"Actually I'm just the tech guy."
"And I care because why? Listen get my entrance ready, and it better be perfect, or it'll be a MIRACLE if you ever walk again I promise you."
"Yes sir!"
So the geek squad kid scurries off like a rodent. I stand admiring myself once again in a mirror they keep backstage. I pull some baby oil out of my robe, and oil myself up real nice to give the ladies a cheap thrill even though they can only look and never touch.
Finally the geek squad member returns and informs my all is set and my entrance will begin in a matter of seconds.
"I appreciate that Johnny!"
"Eh...my name is Rupert."
"Remember that me not caring thing? Yeah it's still in effect."
Just then I hop to attention "I Am Hollywood" by He Is Legend signals the introduction of greatness into the REW.
Some blond bimbo steps into the ring with a microphone and begins informing the fans on just how lucky they really are.
"Introducing to the REW, hailing from Hesperia, California. He stands at six feet three inches tall. He weighs in at a chiseled two hundred twenty-seven pounds. Allow me to introduce "The MIRRRRRRRRRACLEEEEEEEEEE" MANSON HALLMARK! "
I step atop the ramp, and I notice the drool running down the faces of the females who would do just about anything to get a hold of me.
I'm sure all of these fans are quite starstruck I notice tons of flash photography taking place. I finally reach the ring and upon entry I relieve the bimbo of her microphone and shew her from my ring.
"Well you fans consider yourself lucky. You will be able to tell your grandchildren, you where there the night Manson Hallmark made his debut in the REW."
I receive a mixed reaction from the fans upon that announcement.
"You see, I am not like the other hapless wannabe superstars you are used to. The Jaxson Kyzer's, the Blake Worship's, the Sweet Money's. I am "God's Gift To Himself"! "
The jeers seem more illuminated now than before.
"You see I expected jeers and boos from all of you. You hate me not because I'm a bad guy, but because I'm the bad guy you wish you could be, but just can not become."
This time the boos are almost deafening. I however just stand in the center of the ring chuckling
" You see, God decided to create the most divine creature he could as a token of his own hard work, and I was the MIRACLE that followed. But I am out here for a reason. I was backstage and I was sick to my stomach."
I pause for a moment. I demand the stagehand give me a bottle of water. And he does just that. I take a sip and decide to continue my rant.
" There is a man walking around backstage with something that is mine. A man who thinks he really deserves to be holding my Bar Room Brawl Championship. Listen up Comic-Con does not begin for another week, so you can stop it with the big scary creature gimmick ok pal, because it's not working. "
I didn't think it was possible but the jeers increase even more vociferously. But the smile never leaves my face.
" So in other words, DreamKiller sooner or later you and I will meet one on one. I will walk out with my much deserved Bar Room Brawl Championship, and you, it'll be a MIRACLE if you walk out period. But I'm just telling you what you already know!"
I drop the microphone in the center of the ring and roll out and begin my expedition back to my locker room